|Monday, July 17, 2006
Salam Terakhir - Allahyarham Sudirman Hj ArshadSampaikan salam buat semua
Salam terakhir salam teristimewa
Kepada kau yang tersayang
Pada teman yang ku kenang
Pemergian ku ini tak dirancang
Usah bertanya mengapa aku
Mengucap salam terakhir kepada mu
Kerna waktu berputaran
Bimbang tak berkesempatan
Melahirkan kerinduan terhadapmu
Demi sebuah kenyataan
Yang amat menyakitkan
Aku yang tidak berdaya
Hanya berserah padaNya
Salam akhir
Salam yang teristimewa
KepadaNya ku memohon keampunan
MelaluiNya ku beri kemaafan
Kepadamu
Andainya aku punya waktu
Masih ku ingin mengulangi semula
Saat indah bersama mu
Sayang tak berkesempatan
Abadikan saja salam ku di ingatan
Salam ku yang terakhiri love this song. everytime i listen to this song...my heart goes all soft and tears will start to well up in my eyes. have u ever wondered how it will be like when it is time for you to give ur last salam to everyone?
i notice that i tend to give up to my emotions easily. it is like....well...succumbing ur life to the drama in books when in reality...i m actually able to control my heart n my mind. sometimes i admit. i choose to be helpless. in the midst of trying to attain that fairy tale life story...i guess...i have hurt myself even more. i admit. i want to live a life so idealistic that reality had to slap me hard in the face. come on maly. wake up. u noe what u are doing is getting you nowhere. why in the world did u allow urself to be like this.
man. i do not know what happened. what caused the wires in my head to snap just like that.
i am going to pray and do my best to do good. to be that wanita solehah i have always aspired to be. i want to be swayed little by the worldly desires. n realise that...whatever that i have to do...is a passport for me to have a pleasant after-life. u noe..to do anything at all...just because you want to gain His Blessings. n of course. i am weaving hopes and wishes...and the possibility of them becoming true is like me having to wait for the moon to fall on my lap. but as the saying goes...with Him...there is never an impossibility. challenges n more challenges will come brushing and nudging and pushing me frm all sides. but i dun desire giving up my life just like that. i know that God is Great. Insya'Allah...He will help me pull through all this.
i do not need to wait till the year is over to do reflection. muhasabah diri...i do not need to wait till the end is near. the end has always been near. year 2006 has been quite a trying year for me. one after another my heart n mind went through its trials. n my weakness is...i didnt accept it as part of the trials of my life. i felt resentful. i felt frustrated. i kept blaming the toms, dicks and harries in my life about the various down moments. no wonder. i m not ikhlas in accepting Fate...not ikhlas in accepting His trials. my friend's one-liner triggered the warning bells in my head. "it is all in the future."it is something i have to work on. and u noe...
something terrific happened. i got a chance to meet up with sabri buang personally. i dunno if many know him but he is one prolific writer, teater n drama activist etc...who has Masters for his Seni field. he shared with me a lot of stuffs. but one thing that strike me the most...is this.
"there will be a point in your life when you will be arrowed. when God makes you see all that you have done when you are younger. and thats when if you are GOOD enough,u will realise...u have to change."and i shall end my entry.
* spoken&willspeakagain*
10:29 PM