sad post|Saturday, April 28, 2007
you know yesterday...i woke up thrice during the night. i slept at 1130pm. then i woke up at 1230am. i was feeling quite fresh though. then i slept again and woke up at 430am. i slept again and woke up at 6am. i thought i was stressed. i think i have been thinking too much with regard to whatever that happened the night before. and i thought i have stopped thinking about it. i have stopped thinking about it. i dun wanna think about it anymore. i am tired. very tired. i keep telling myself that...to let it come. and now i have learnt my lesson. NEVER embrace everything too hard, for too long. i was very sad. but i had to do what i had to do. now i understood why things had to happen the way it happened almost ten months ago. ku redha. ku ikhlas. ku tiada sebab untuk menantikan kehadiranmu kembali dalam hidupku. kerana sudah lama kau berlalu. tetapi aku masih menaruh sedikit harapan...akan ku menanti sedikit lagi...there is always a struggle. i made a mistake. a grave mistake. and then there was love. and then there was an attempt to love. and then there was a greater attempt at love. and then, i gave up. because...my heart does not love. i tried too tame it, but it turned out futile. i cant force it to love. because it was still loving something else. or maybe...it is just rejecting love at the moment. i dunno. i may sound flippant. but. who knows. really. who knows. i cant understand. kepadamu, aku mohon ampun dan maaf...Labels: apologies and acceptance
* spoken&willspeakagain*
10:12 PM